Lone Ranger vs. Despicable Me 2

I like the Lone Ranger.  Lone Ranger was a TV series 1949-1957.  Reruns were going in the 1960s when I was a kiddo.  ‘Couldn’t tell you much about the themes or what the plot was but it was “feel good” material and though the memories are vague, they are nice to think back upon.

The Lone Ranger theme being generally a good one, I presumed that the producers of the 2013 version, done by Disney, would feel some obligation to adhere to the basic upstanding overtones.  They used Johnny Depp as “Tonto,” and Armie Hammer played the off kilter non-Christian “hero.”  These two are skilled actor with a variety of top notch abilities.  Needless to say I was anticipating this movie that released on July 03, 2013.

Come early summer 2013 I noticed that Despicable Me 2 was set to release the same day as the very much anticipated Lone Ranger, featuring Johnny Depp, who would no doubt would display his craft in a new genre sure to haunt movie goers and create a buzz that would ripple through the culture.  I mused that the people behind Despicable Me 2 were creating financial suicide by releasing their movie head-to-head against Depp/Hammer in Lone Ranger.  And who would be silly enough to compete with a classic being reintroduced?

Coincidentally, my wife and I were able to meet the two authors of the Despicable Me… Series.  What a delight to learn that the authors are Believers.  Despicable Me is a story line that paints truth for what it is: cruelty is wrong, virtue is what we are to be about, it is redemptive, constructive, and so forth.  I hadn’t even pondered seeing D.M.2 but learning of its Christian undertones certainly was encouraging.

Needless to say, July 3, 2013 came and I stuck to my former decision and went to Lone Ranger.  I was very excited for the day … and then very chagrined on the walk home afterward.  I was actually nauseated.  It was the most disappointing theater experience going as far back as I can remember.  Lone Ranger [the 2013 version] is extremely anti-Christian – unnervingly so.  The Christians in the movie are depicted as blithering dingbats. The man with the biggest prayer life is the biggest crook and a murderer.

His family is sadistic. The prayers of the cavalry are so that the Lord will help them kill the heathen savage Indians.  Throughout the movie the viewer becomes endeared to the natives.  And who kills them? the Christians do!  (…Like they destroy everything else that’s good.)  A strong agenda in the movie is that Church, God, Bible, faith, prayer, is all nonsense.  Christian activity and ministry is folly.  When it is practiced it is done so solely by hypocritical buffoons with no self-control.

There is a sub plot of the evil white man (I mean really, isn’t this getting old?) tearing apart the mountains and the environment to obtain silver that can be snuck to the big city for a huge cash in.  The movie spends much of its time training the viewer to hope this train [that will eventually transport this silver] is stopped, or wrecks or is blown up.  Watching it one resolves, “yeesh, stop that train!”

Very late in the movie, the train finally comes into view – and the name of the train is, what else but the “U.S. Constitution.”  Their point is that we need to stop the U.S. Constitution.  Do they think that no one is going to pick up on their twisted agenda here?

Well, the public spoke: Despicable Me 2 netted nearly $900 million while teaching virtue.  Simultaneously, The Lone Ranger lost well over $100 million while teaching secularism, hypocrisy, cannibalism, and the wonders of pagan meaninglessness.

Will Hollywood wake up in this decade and realize that the public wants something significant to ponder?  Their alternative is bankruptcy.